According to ESPN, Rob Gronkowski will be back and playing in Tampa with Tom Brady. The New England Patriots still owned the rights to "Gronk," in retirement and traded them away for a 4th round draft pick. The news stunned the sports world last night (4/21/20) and Reddit was quick to react.

caesar315 posted:

Tom, I've told you. For the last time, I'm retired

Brady takes his hands off Gronk's eyes, revealing the big pirate ship in the stadium

Responses to caesar315:

I_need_that_bacon:

You son of a bitch I'm in

Grasshop:

Can I fire the cannon???

jmprobus:

But Tom, how are we supposed to get this thing all the way to the ocean?

ehbacon23

Brady leans in close, whispering so that the air from his speech brushed gently on Gronk's ears just as a soothing, warm summer breeze glides through the slender leaves of a palm tree. "Yo ho, yo ho."

Gronk quivers. A tear rolls down his cheak as he slowly opens his eyes. Their gazes meet. With a faint smile, Gronk whispers back, "A pirate's life for me."

tonto515:

Gronk is evolving! Gronk has become FLORIDA MAN.

synester302:

over/under until he owns a tiger zoo?

amaton27:

Why cant they just go away. Make the bad man stop!

ALiddleCovfefe:

Report: Edelman just reported to camp in a hot air balloon and said his helmet sucks and started masturbating behind people

AnarchyPlus:

Edelman about to be the Squidward looking out the window meme

OneAngryPanda:

Throw in a bag a weed and you got yourself a deal

In related news, a new survey reveals there are three New England Patriots fans left in America and one of them is Bill Belichick. I conducted the survey myself, last night by calling everyone in my phone. I realize the sample is small but I needed to get stats out while people still care. Carole Baskin could be doing the "perp walk" any day now. What's that sound? Oh nothing, that's just the birth of five million new Tampa Bay fans. It's baby making season.

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