According to NBC Miami/People, I have found yet another reason to never step foot on a cruise ship.

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Apparently one passenger decided the buffet utensils weren't just for eating. This absolute farm animal was caught on video using a dinner fork to scrape what appeared to be foot fungus while sitting on a Carnival cruise. If you just gagged a little, congratulations, your brain still works.

The video has racked up more than 28 million views, mostly because people couldn't believe what they were watching. According to those who filmed it, you could even see skin flakes falling to the floor. That's enough internet for the day.

Carnival eventually addressed the situation with what may be the funniest corporate statement ever. The cruise line confirmed that forks are intended for food, not foot maintenance. Somewhere, an employee had to type that sentence with a straight face. Imagine going home after work and telling your family, "Today I had to explain that silverware isn't a podiatry tool."

The cruise line says staff removed the fork from service after learning about the incident and spoke with the passenger. I sure hope they didn't just wash it and throw it back into circulation. At that point, the fork deserves a Viking funeral.

The women who recorded the incident claimed they didn't get much of a response when they first reported it, although in fairness, "Excuse me, there's a woman exfoliating her hoof with cutlery," probably isn't covered in the employee handbook.

This is exactly why you'll never convince me to take a cruise. Thousands of strangers packed onto one floating hotel, sharing buffets, elevators, pools, and apparently pedicure utensils? Hard pass.

I've always wondered what the grossest thing to happen on a cruise ship was. I think we have a new leader in the clubhouse, and I sincerely hope this farm animal packs nail clippers the next time she vacations.  

 

 

 

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