Happy National Donald Duck Day! This is a real thing, June 9th of every year is a celebration of all things Donald Duck. Donald made his debut on June 9th, 1934 in a cartoon called "The Wise Little Hen."  It featured a chicken seeking help her plant corn  but Donald was too lazy and pretended to have a stomach ache. In a world filled with annoying cartoon characters, Donald is one of the greats and I've always been a fan of his work.

Back in the day (Wednesday), I used to do stand up comedy and I so badly wanted to work an impression into my act but it's not worth doing unless it's really good. I was always able to do really good DD noises but could not make enough words to finish a dialogue joke. I thought, what if  Donald doesn't have to talk? This thought would result in the only short joke I've ever been able to write. I give you Donald Duck on cocaine.

I just had a bolt of lightning, Donald Duck Day is going to come and go but these characters we all know, need to be ranked by a person who knows what the hell they are talking about. That person is me so buckle up kids, Friday's big article will be "Disney characters ranked by me."

P.S. The featured image with Christina Aguilera (XTINA) was the happiest accident/gift of my day. Lady, pull your pants up, you are scaring the kids and making the dads act weird AF. Sweet Fancy Moses she looks good. 

Enter your number to get our free mobile app