Sex Improves Brain Function as You Get Older

Got some brain funk? Grab some old junk. Problem meet solution. If it were just that easy, though.

The New York Post published the results of a study that says sex improves your brain function as you get older. The subjects of the study were men and women between the ages of 50 and 83. Those who said they had sex on a regular basis scored higher on vocabulary and visual tests.

It has be harder to care, or pretend to care, about sex when you reach a certain age. I'm not talking about the 50-year-old people here. They should want to have sex still, of course. But 83? I have care about that when I am 83 in order to keep my brain working?

I hope I don't care about sex when I am 83. Sex may keep most people's minds sharp, but it also clouds judgement. That has been my experience at least. It's distracting.

Assuming I am lucky enough to make it to 83, I just want to read the paper, eat tuna, nap on the couch, watch game shows, and complain about my hips. I don't want to musk up, put on my best white socks, get in the golf cart, and hit the community center hunting for sweet, dusty action.