Creamed onions are the devil's dish and should not be made available on the Thanksgiving table or any other table for that matter. The only reason they are there is because someone knows how to make them. They don't taste good, they have an unpleasant texture and they unquestionably look like testicles.

Stop serving these at Thanksgiving, please, I beg this of you. Tradition is a double-edged sword. Some traditions can warm our hearts, tickle our nostalgia bone and make us feel good all over. Other traditions are there because they were there before and that's it. It's vital to our evolution as a species, to identify terrible traditions and bid them adieu. The serving of creamed onions is a tradition that is bad and needs to be stopped now.

I'm pro cream sauce, it's almost perfect, you can cover almost anything in it and have a slam dunk, almost anything. The minute you run it over onions you have identified it's weakness, it's delicious power is just not enough to fix an onion ball. Just say no to cream onions, join me in ridding the world of the devil's dish.





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