Blonde or Brunette?

The British tabloid The Star has come out with a new study detailing the perfect girlfriend, with everything taken into consideration from her music taste to her bra size.

According to a bunch of guys in Surrey England, she is:

Brunette
Stands 5’5″ and weighs 128 lbs
Wears a 34C bra
Works as a nurse or a teacher
Careful about her diet
Gets along with her mother
Sexually “adventurous”
No tattoos
Uses “subtle” makeup
Likes skinny jeans and miniskirts
Loves Game of Thrones and Dirty Dancing

AH yes, it’s the age-old question…blonde or brunette?  Well the fact of the matter is I’ve done some research and here is what I have come up with:

Brunette:

Annoying, needy, can cook and is hairy

Blonde:

Less annoying, independent, Bi-polar, can’t cook and has less body hair. 

They are ALL annoying.  We are annoying to them though and there are reasons.  We smell, we fart, are not held to the same physical standards and love our moms too much.  Oh and we are gross (which is true).  The fact is what she looks like does not matter, I mean if you were attracted to her to begin with, then you are attracted to her but one versus the other is a waste.  Although blonde girls have the less offensive armpit hair.  HAHA!  As for:  The Star – The ideal woman!  They have it all wrong:

Here it is:

You should be attracted to her

She should get along with your family

She should do one thing in bed that no woman wants to do but does it for you

She should LOVE the “Lego” movie and tolerate watching “Sons of Anarchy” with you.

Any rubbing; back, feet, otherwise, should be mutual or turn taking

Her hair should smell amazing and her breath better too!

She should allow you to talk asinine stuff like this…. and let you get away with it 80 percent of the time. 

BLONDE OR BRUNETTE?  I say blonde but my girlfriend is blonde and I’m scared of her…. which is kind of hot.