Specific Scissors Birth Almost Every New Danbury Business

These gold scissors are very important to Danbury, CT.

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They are present at the birth of almost every new Hat City business. They are the official ribbon cutting scissors of Danbury. That is correct, the folks at City Hall have a dedicated, official, giant pair of scissors that they bring to every ribbon-cutting in Danbury.

I found this out recently (7/21/22) when I attended the Grand Opening of the new Sonic Drive-In on White Street. I'd been to a lot of (2) ribbon cuttings in my time and never made a point to look at the scissors but I did this time and noticed they were gold and enormous. There is no doubt in my mind that Donald Trump opens all his mail with scissors just like this.

After I made a mental note that the scissors were unique, I approached the people who were watching them. I approached two people who work for Danbury Mayor Dean Esposito and asked "are these official ribbon-cutting ceremonial scissors?" They replied yes. My instant reaction was to tell them, to their face "I will steal these."

I mean it, this is my life mission now, I must have these scissors. I'm not a criminal, I'm not a bad guy, nor do I need to cut big things. I need to make a specific statement. That statement is, an item this specific, need not be. This may be the hill I die on, I stand in defiance of humongous gold scissors.

P.S. I knew the Mayor's mustache had gotten big, but I could not have known how big until I saw these scissors.