A map of the U.S. landed in my inbox recently, with each state's most lewd town name.

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The map and research were put together by a Real Estate company called Estately who decided that Essex is the dirtiest name in Connecticut. In my opinion, this falls short of expectations. I would have gone with Moosup or Seymour, CT. Sadly, I cannot be in charge of everything, I've tried.

I did learn a lot from this map. For instance, there is a place called Humptulips, Washington. Did you know that? Below is the map, featuring what Estately believes is the lowest of the low.

Estately
Estately
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They did list off other options that were available to them, these are some of my favorites:

  • Smut Eye, Alabama
  • Manley Hot Springs, Alaska
  • Bald Knob, Arkansas
  • Clam Beach, California
  • Cave Colony, Delaware
  • Cream Can Junction, Idaho
  • Climax, Michigan
  • Bangs, Texas

But my biggest takeaway from the Estately research, is how filthy New York State is. The Empire State has a long list of options to choose from like:

  • Ballston
  • Butternuts
  • Climax
  • Conewango
  • Conquest
  • Corning
  • Coxsackie
  • Feura Bush
  • Fort Johnson
  • Glen Head
  • Johnson
  • Johnson City
  • Kringsbush
  • Porcaville
  • Pound Ridge
  • Rockwood
  • Sugarbush

New York needs to calm the ____ down! Was the entire state founded on the bedrock of nasty behavior?

I see a road trip in my future, I gas up the RV, create a new Instagram account and visit places like Cheat Lake, Wisconsin, or Hoback, McNutt, Wyoming. This will be the easiest social media cheddar, I've ever made in my life.

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