It's my opinion that the Christmas lights have to be down no later than the end of the first week of January. It sucks, because it signals the end of the holiday season and the beginning of the long, painful, harsh, relentless and pointless winter. It does, however, need to be done.

I am not a huge "keeping up with the Joneses" kind of guy. I don't like to be judgmental with people's homes and property, it's just not nice. You don't know what is going on in those people's lives, and let's be honest, maintaining a home is terrible for everyone.

When it comes to the Christmas lights, however, you just have to get it done. I say, if you keep your lawn mowed in the summer, and get the Christmas lights down at a reasonable date you are a-okay in my book.

I walked out of my house minutes after the kids had opened their presents, grabbed the ladder, ripped the lights off the house, rolled them in a ball, threw em' in a bucket, and said "Christmas is over!" I was delighted with myself.

I think the three months we spend celebrating two actual holidays is quite enough. Merry F'n XMAS.

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