What kind of a human being runs over and kills 20 geese?

According to Fox61.com, police say a motorist hit more than 20 geese near Lakewood Park in Waterbury this past Sunday morning shortly after 5:15 am. Police have identified the vehicle because the license plate fell off during the incident, but the driver sped away. The owner of the vehicle claims that she doesn't know who was driving her car at the time, and as far-fetched as that sounds, the search for answers continues. Waterbury police don't know if the incident was intentional or not.

There could be a couple of things in play here. Keep in mind, I'm just speculating.

It was 5:35 am on a Sunday, so there's the possibility the driver could have been wasted and wasn't paying attention. Maybe the guy was on a dose of Flakka, which is a cheap synthetic drug that is also referred to as "insanity." Maybe this douche fell asleep at the wheel and didn't see 20 geese with their wings flapping away.

Unfortunately, there is the possibility that the driver found great pleasure in running over and killing 20 geese. If that's found to be the case, once he's apprehended, my recommendation would be to have a trained professional armed with a pair of tweezers and pull out every piece of body hair on his ass and then toss him in jail for a week or two.


Listen to Ethan Carey on the Ethan & Lou Show weekdays from 5:30-10AM on 95.1 FM. You can listen online at i95rock.com/listen-live/ or by downloading the radioPupapp for your mobile device.

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