I got a text from my buddy Jim Kilgallen yesterday asking me if I've ever heard about the real, correct way to close a cereal box. He asked, "Did you know about this? Apparently, this is the correct way to close a cereal box." My mind was blown, how could this information elude us for so long? I like to think I'm up on things and even if I'm late to the party on certain information, I'm never super late.

The structure of the cereal box has not changed in many years. What we have now is basically what we had when I was a kid. This is a feature that the cereal companies could have demonstrated like forty years ago and it never happened. It's obviously a better way to close the box so why didn't they tell us this was possible?

Here's my one and only theory about why they would keep this feature a secret, if we don't close the box right, we have to buy more sooner. You might be asking then why would they have a correct way to close the box at all? That's so the the families of the cereal companies who are "in the know" can have fresh cereal for longer. It all makes sense now and it sickens me. This entire country is built on a foundation of lies meant to keep me down.

I mean cereal costs like $81 dollars a box and what does it cost these companies to make one, 5 cents? If my math is correct that's a 4,568% profit margin (that was a guess, I have no idea). Things need to start changing around here (Earth) because in these unprecedented, trying times the least they can do for us is to keep some of our our money in our pocket. Spread the word y'all, the secret is out we can keep our cereal fresher, longer.

I will never understand people, they're the worst.

Here is an instructional video on how to do it in your home.

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