The Most Terrifying Thing of This Halloween, Mike Tyson’s New Song

The new song from Mike Tyson is scary, scary bad. It's technically an EDM (Electronic Dance Music) club track from a group known as Tiki Lau.

The song is called "Mike Tyson" because why overthink it and is burning up COVID infested dance floors everywhere. Mike was responsible for the vocals and from what I can tell it took him about thirty one seconds to record them.

Here we go:

"I'm Mike Tyson, I'm Mike Tyson, I'm Mike Tyson." These are powerful lyrics that would intimidate even the most skilled songwriter.

We are well past emergency, threat level midnight when it comes to music. The national soundscape is as bad as it's ever been. If you could smell sound, this smell would be one, more offensive than Kevin Malone's wedding shoes and we all know they were deemed a "safety issue."

I don't know how many drugs I'd need to consume to find myself dancing to "Mike Tyson" from Tiki Lau but I am willing to donate my mind and body to science to find out. We can do this on the up and up, all scientific like.

We establish a controlled environment, maybe a padded room with a bed, a dance floor and some lights. The scientists come in and give me an upper, put the song on and wait. When that doesn't work, a downer, a zim-zam, a red, a blue, a flim-flam, maybe some bangers and hash and we work the drugs, until the drugs work.

If we don't try, we can't know and getting to the bottom of this is what I am about right now. Otherwise, what are we doing here?