Planning Our Annual Festivus Party For Our Friends is Becoming Exhausting

Last year we started the annual tradition that should have begun long ago. As a Seinfeld fan since the beginning, it's always been an itch I did not scratch. Finally, last year, my wife Erica organized our first ever Festivus celebration and it was a delightful celebration filled with insults and misbehavior.

(ADULTS Left to Right: Renee, Bryan, Meagan, Rob, Lisa, Ally, Anthony, Erica with pole, me, Katy and Ryan. Billy is behind Rob and completely blocked out but he is there. I remember for sure that he was there because he and Meagan insisted on making out in the rest of the photos.) 

The second annual Milano/Reyes Festivus is in the planning stages now and is giving me a headache. Maybe the biggest pain in the ass, is the group text message we have going with all the guests. I love my friends but it's all day and that would be fine because they know I will check in when I am available. When I do get that time, I check back and answer a days worth of texts and say terribly offensive things and then none of them want to play. That's frustrating and will be the first grievance I air this year.

The other part of the problem with this event is, I feel pressure to "one-up" last year's very successful party. This year, the grievances have got to be meaner, sharper and more cutting. The feats of strength needs to be a bloodbath and the pole needs to sparkle like the North Star.

This party is going to take a lot out of me and will be worth it. Happy Festivus Georgie. Don't ever forget the real reason for the season. A father viciously beat another man with his fists in a department store, fighting over the last doll for his child. He knew there had to be another way and Festivus was born, that's what this is really all about.

Highlights of year one:

While it was funny, I did not appreciate Rob tainting the theme with SNL references.

The ladies (referencing Ally's chest) L to R: Erica, Lisa, Ally

The beginning of the aforementioned, gratuitous make-out with Meagan and Billy.