Scientists in China have combined human genes with monkey genes for the first time ever by splicing human brain genes into monkeys. So for what reason, you ask?

According to the MIT Technology Review, it's to see if it would make them smarter. The experiment did have an affect, they say. They performed better on memory tests they were given, but their brains did not grow any more than normal. They claim their brains developed slower than your average monkey, much like a human child's brain would. One University of Colorado professor described this as, "A slippery slope." Ya don't say!? WHOA, my little monkey mind is blown.

First off -- China. Keep your eye on them. I've been saying that for years, but c'mon, man. This group misbehaves on epic levels. There are so many moral and ethical questions that need to be considered here and they said, "F that noise, I'm blowing the stop light."

Second, When will we finally use American cinema as a learning tool? Think Charlton, James Franco -- even Mark Wahlberg knows. You can't let the monkeys rise, bro.

Third, I take it all back. I need to have a conversation with a monkey before I die. I need someone I can finally relate to. Duck and cover, kids. It's banana land out there. Now let's watch some monkeys doing monkey things: