Want to embarrass your family or be arrested for public indecency? I have just the thing for you, introducing the "Brokini." At the moment there are only two styles avavilable but you only need two when they are this damn sexy.

"Fineapple Brokini"

Brokini.com

Just look at the joy the "Fineapple" brought to this young lady. The "Fineapple" is a great value at just $40 and is made from 85% Polyester and 15% Spandex. The product is made with pride in South Korea. How long will it take to ship? That's a great question and thankfully the fine folks at Brokini answer that question on their website saying, "It depends on how often we check our emails. Normally like 1-2 weeks though?"

"Bromingo Brokini

Brokini.com

Picture yourself spreading out as wide as you possibly can on the pontoon boat on Candlewood Lake, enjoying a lazy day and tanning your inner thighs. The "Bromingo Brokini" will capture attention and make you the envy of "Chicken Rock." The Bromingo is also made with pride is South Korea and is a polyester/spandex blend. Nothing says summer fun like explaining yourself all day. "Why are you wearing that?" "Why is there only one strap?" "When are you going to change?"

Don't take my word for how much people love these products. Check out the website testimonials:

  • 2 out of 2 moms polled said our website is: “it looks great honey”
  • 5 out of 5 dentists said “What are you doing in my office? You can’t be here without an appointment!”

Brokini because F--- it, the world is so obviously ending. Why not give everyone an steaming eye full of junk?

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