I love American history -- I really do. Some people don't believe this, but I like to think of myself as someone who respects our history. I watch the History Channel like you read about and I paid close attention in history class -- I know my stuff. Take this, Ethan!

In all honesty, I paid little to no attention in school. I thought it was a goofy practice. We tell you things, you write them down, read them later, memorize them, and then repeat them back to us later.

Oh, is that all? How bout no. Learning should be more than memorization. Jazz it up, buttwad. I was always envious of the fictional students who were taught by fictional teachers in movies. The teachers always found a way to present information so that the students were engaged and could form their own opinion on what was presented. Instead, I got a few pot heads and task masters for teachers.

I was certain that Calvin Coolidge was in Kool and the Gang. Happy President's Day, y'all.

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