Idiots Doing Sober Juice Crawls Instead of Bar Crawls

If you wanna be sober, I am all for it. That's your journey, and you should live it. 

However, you don't need to have juice-themed parties in the style of more traditional booze-themed parties. It's a nipple head, millennial thing to do, and it needs to be stopped. According to the Guardian, this past Saturday in Manhattan, there was a sober juice crawl.

I like juice as much as the next guy, but how much juice can you drink in a day? What are you going to talk about as you walk from juice bar to juice bar? I think I know the answer, it's as simple as can be. They have self righteous conversations about how much better they feel about their bodies and minds, without polluting their bodies with alcohol. OH, GOOOOOD FOR YOOOOOU!

I have nothing negative to say to, or about, anyone who treats their body like a temple, but in so many cases, these people feel the need to advertise it. They feel the need to pat themselves on the back while judging others aloud, and on social media.

Have your fun, kids. Juice it up. I'll be knee deep in drunk chicks, doing shots of Jack, and laughing uncontrollably.