First of all, it means I likely missed a chance to see Pitbull, who is one of my favorite people. Pitbull is happy ALL the time and why not? Dude makes music a 5-year-old could make while flanked by beautiful women. He also happens to have a fantastic wardrobe.

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I now know that I missed seeing musical performances by:

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HER:

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HER:

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HER:

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AND HOW COULD I FORGET THEM:

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I will not miss this event next year. I am sure it's like all the other awards shows in that everyone showers everyone with love for making music, movies and tons of money. It also seems to have some extremely attractive people being extremely attractive while singing and dancing.

There is one side effect — my wife is Domincan and a big fan of Latin music, so she will dance and want me to dance. This is where it all falls apart. She's hot and can dance and I am awkward and cannot. It's like a commercial for beer goggles.

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