Danbury, along with most of the Hudson Valley, are bracing for a severe dip into the deep freeze tonight. Here's a list of helpful suggestions to guide you through this beastly weather blast.

1. Purchase 25 loaves of Wonder Bread per person and duct tape them around your body. Not only will they keep you nice and toasty but will act as a cushion if you should fall in your driveway. Thanks to Lou for this one!

Interstate Bakeries Files Chapter 11
Getty Images
loading...

2. Do Not wrap your arms or legs with electric heating tape. This will prevent your body from going up in flames.

3. If you're using a propane heater should the electricity go down, crack a                   window so you don't die from carbon monoxide poisoning, and definitely do not wheel your propane fueled gas grill into the living room.

getty
getty
loading...

4. If you need to dress your pets in warm clothing, PLEASE do not take cutsie           photos and post them on Facebook.

Dogs Dress Up At Annual "Pug Parade"
Getty Images
loading...

5. If someone should ask you if you want to build a snowman, the correct answer is, "No, I don't want to build a f**king snowman, I want to build a sand castle on a beach in the Caribbean!"

Christmas on Bondi Beach
Getty Images
loading...

6. I've heard that smearing yourself in goose fat keeps you nice and warm, plus it comes off pretty easily, except inside your belly button. Vaseline Petroleum Jelly can be used as a substitute if there is no goose fat available, but it's tougher to remove from human skin so hunker down all you snow troopers. You can  survive this!

Goose Farmers Prepare For Christmas Season
Getty Images
loading...

Is the i95 Radio Staff Ready For the Cold Snap Coming for Connecticut?

What Do You Think of the 'Baby, It's Cold Outside' Controversy?

 

Listen to Ethan Carey on the Ethan & Lou Show weekdays from 5:30-10AM on 95.1 FM. You can listen online at i95rock.com/listen-live/ or by downloading the radioPup app for your mobile device.

More From WRKI and WINE