A 30 year old man from China recently had a large dead tilapia removed from his rectum. The man sought care after experiencing intense abdominal pain that he says lasted more than an hour. Doctors at the Zhaoqing First People’s Hospital in Guangdong, China did not specify the fishes size and the patient claims it got there because he accidentally sat on it. According to Metro UK, a nurse at the facility replied: "Do you think I’m an idiot?."

There are more details relating to the surgery and the reported smells in the operating room, I'll spare you. You don't need to know about the blurred and yet still gruesome video footage making it's way around the web, I think we have plenty of horrific detail to work with here.

I hate to do this but my loved ones are always encouraging me to put myself in the other persons shoes or in this case pants so I'll give it a shot. When you have a large fish removed from your ass, this is no time to start telling the truth. Any lie you can pull from the lie Rolodex will be bad, his was terrible and unbelievable but he had no choice.

Now I'd like to be back on the side of people who didn't recently have a large fish pulled out of their rear end, this cannot stand. Whatever your kink is, cool man but you cannot have it impacting the lives of strangers like this. Hopefully this man does some reflection because all reports indicate that the surgery was unpleasant for everyone who had to be there. Doctors, nurses all just furious with you and rightfully so.

Pull it together salmon pants, we live in a society.

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