So I'm flipping through some stupid news stories this morning looking for some extra items for this morning's Ethan and Lou show and I happened upon this little nugget of information. It turns out that your nipple color is the key to unlocking your best lipstick shade. I found this clip from "The Doctors."

I immediately texted my wife after learning this and said, "quick, send me a picture of your nipples." After we cleared all the confusion as to why I said that she told me she knew and that this was the worst kept secret in the world. I kind of figured. I did not expect I was breaking any nipple news here but it got me to thinking there must be some ladies who don't know.

Lightning struck at that moment. I can start a new business where I educate the ladies of this great country on how to find their best shade. I can put together a whole sample book with swatches of thousands of different lipstick shades. I take that book, I buy a van, travel the country inspecting nipples and assigning the right shade to ladies in all 50 states and make a buck or two.

On second thought, a dude in a van with a notebook asking to see ladies nipples may be a flawed idea. I'm not married to the idea.

What other weird or extreme things do ladies do to look good? We will talk about this tomorrow on the Ethan and Lou show.