I told my son, Lucas, every day since he got his bike, to put it away. Every day since he got it, I said, "Go get your bike out of the driveway and put it away." Every. Single. Day. I said, "If you leave your bike in the driveway, one of us is going to run it over."

Well, Papa, ran it over and now here we are. This happened a couple of weeks ago and I'm still blown away. I'm blown away that I sound like my father more and more on a daily basis, and that's scary.

Listening to myself repeat the same things over and over is what is most upsetting. I'm literally tired of my own voice and repeating the same things. It's enough to drive a person mad.

Either I just stop instructing the kids on what to do and hope the house does not burn to the ground, or I keep going, and end up in a mental institution. I'll be staring out a window repeating, "Don't forget to put your bike away."

I'm sure I am not alone here, and this has been going on since the dawn of man, but c'mon.

Here are the other classics I repeat everyday:

  • "Get your feet off the couch with your shoes on."
  • "You're not taking food in your room."
  • "If you guys can't treat each other with respect, you cannot play together."
  • "If you are bored, go outside and play."
  • "Video games are stupid and you guys should give them up for good."
  • "Don't talk back to me, this is not a Democracy."
  • "Don't talk to your mother that way."
  • "I told you to stop saying 'Cash me outside, how bow dat?'"
  • "YouTube is not a career."
  • "Put down the ax."

Now that I got that off my chest, what do you have to repeat to your kids on a daily basis?