**DISCLAIMER - My wife Erica is beautiful, smart, funny and caring. She enriches my life and the lives of my children everyday. I would be lost without her. If my biggest problem with her is the dinner bill, then things are going just fine. I bow at her feet and worship the ground she walks on. Please proceed to the blog:

One of the few luxuries that my wife Erica and I allow ourselves is going out to dinner as often as we can. We are on a tight budget what with all these children. It is hard, however, to continue going out if SOMEONE doesn't stop ordering all these damned appetizers.

Erica has this thing, where she needs to taste everything on the menu. That's not to say, of course, that she is eating all of it. She just wants some of everything. I'm happy for you, but if you order three appetizers, that takes our $45 bill to 90 bucks in a hurry. I've run the math. Eighteen appetizers runs the bill to roughly $4 million. We don't have that kind of dough laying around.

The only thing I can do to keep it reasonable, is to go back to what I used to do, which is to not order anything for myself. Not a big deal. It works out great, because even if I order myself nothing, there is still a truck load of food still left on the table. I can just eat everyone's leftovers and be fine.

I love me some apps as much as the next guy, but can we lower the main Skid Row? Sure, in a perfect world I'd love to have some Jalapeno poppers, mozzarella sticks, fries, and fried calamari. You know, a little of everything, but the babies need shoes.