I was just handed that festive note about a Secret Santa and Holiday Celebration here at the radio station on December 15. Is it OK to call in sick?

I can't put my finger on it as to why I immediately become uncomfortable when the Secret Santa memo is delivered. I don't have any issues with anyone in the office. In fact, I like almost everyone! Maybe it's because I feel the need to come up with a creative and interesting Secret Santa gift. The memo says that the price limit for Secret Santa gifts is $15. What in God's name can you buy for $15?! A case of beer or an OK bottle of wine could work. That's kind of classy, right? What if the recipient doesn't like booze? I know -- how about a giant bottle of Fiji water? The best of the best when it comes to bottled water. Shouldn't the Secret Santa Luncheon be for the chicks only?

You could go with the gag gift like something disgusting, but with the sexual harassment policy in most work places, you don't want to get fired for giving someone a Maybe You Touched Your Genitals Hand Sanitizer by Blue Q available on Amazon.com.

Hand Sanitizer by Blue Q - Available on Amazon.com


You could certainly give an idiotic gift like that to someone like Lou, but then you'd have to loan him the money to actually purchase the gift. Here's another wonderful Christmas-y Secret Santa suggestion. What do you think about a Pull My Finger Farting Santa by CloseOut Zone, and it comes in just under the wire at $14.39 available on Amazon.com

Pull My Finger Farting Santa by CloseOut Zone- Amazon.com


Here's one more suggestion for the most stressed out person at the office, MySack Smack A Sack, Stress Relief Sack W/2 Red Stress Ball by MySack available on Amazon.com. If you don't think that's funny, I don't want to even know you.

MySack Smack A Sack by MySack - Amazon.com


Listen to Ethan Carey on the Ethan & Lou Show weekdays from 5:30-10AM on 95.1 FM. You can listen online at i95rock.com/listen-live/ or by downloading the radioPup app for your mobile device.