According to a report from the Danbury Police Department, two men allegedly stole used cooking oil from two unnamed restaurants.

The two Yonkers, NY men, Jose Martinez and Mario Garcia have been charged with trespassing and larceny. The men are alleged to have lifted the oil using an unmarked van and siphoning equipment. Police say a local restaurateur staked out his own business, observed the heist, followed the van, and called police. Authorities caught up with the two and arrested them in the parking lot of Stew Leonard's.

In the words of the great Dr. Evil, WAY TO GO, A-HOLES!

You talk about a crime that pays man, heisting used fry oil has to be up near the top of that list. I'm not PRO thief, but I'd like to think that if I was going to steal something, I would go straight for cash.

I mean, you have to steal the oil first, and then find a used fry oil fence on the streets of Danbury, CT. I'm going to go out on a limb and say there are not that many out there. It's either that or they were going to fry a butt load of chickens. Or maybe they were going to fuel their vehicles with it. That's a thing, right? At least that what I heard on our own website a few months ago. Yeah, maybe their cars run on leftover fry oil from Hunan palace like Dave Franco's car in 21 Jumpstreet. This clip contains the "F" word, so if that offends you, don't play it.

Now, the two restaurants that were robbed of their fry oil were not mentioned. I find that weird. I will now make it my personal mission in life to find out what restaurants were robbed, and why they were unnamed in the report.

Furthermore, I find it fishy that this restaurant owner was staking out his own restaurant and caught them in the act. Either this guy has a lot of time on his hands or he is getting robbed on a daily basis. Robbed like you read about.

There you go, Mr. Local Business owner, nothing is safe, nothing is sacred, duck and cover -- they are coming for your oil.

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