According to an article from my intergalactic morning show partner, Ethan, there will be a UFO conference at the Danbury Library on Saturday (October 14) from 10 am to 5 pm. One of the speakers will be popular UFO researcher, Linda Zimmerman. Apparently, the focus of the conference will be on UFO sightings both in the Hudson Valley and Western CT from back in the 80s.

While I am truly interested in the topic of UFOs, and would probably enjoy going and listening, I'd rather cause trouble.

I thought if I asked stupid questions throughout, I would be able to effectively derail the whole thing, which is fun. I thought I'd wait about ten minutes into the conference, raise my hand and ask, "What is a UFO?" I figure that will set the tone for the room on what I hope to accomplish.

We asked for question suggestions this morning on the Ethan and Lou show and got many responses. The fact is, though, that all of the questions we received related to "probing" of the rear end. Like, why do aliens dig around in our bum-bum? Maybe we have something very valuable that we are not even aware of. It's a solid question, it's one I will ask. It's also the one that will get me thrown out, so I will save that one for last.

Do you have any other non-anus related questions I can ask? Let me know soon, Saturday is fast approaching, and I want to be prepared. I am a trouble maker like Woody Woodpecker.

P.S. - FOX will roll out season 11 of The X Files late this year. It better be WAY more awesome than season 10 was.

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Watch a Special Edition of Ethan & Lou's "Missed Headlines" Segment